Considerations

Unfortunately, it is often the case that abuse does not end once you have left the relationship. It is common for abuse and violence to escalate at this point, so it is very important to remain safe and take careful considerations in a few aspects of your life. Here are some considerations that we suggest.

  • Report all incidents to the police
  • Report all breaches of restraining order conditions
  • Inform your friends, neighbours, and employers that there is a restraining order in effect and ask them to inform you of any contact the perpetrator attempts to make with them also
  • Give copies of the restraining order to employers, neighbours, and schools, along with a picture of the offender.
  • Change your phone number and inform your service provider of your situation; request your new number be unlisted. Be careful who you share the new number with and screen unfamiliar numbers.
  • Protect your mail. Get a PO Box or check your mail every day in your home mailbox, and shred mail with identifying information (bank statements, pre-approved credit cards, or appointments).
  • Change your locks, even if they have returned the key. Copies may have been made.
  • Check all window locks and ensure they are locked. (Even on the second floor of your home)
  • Install an alarm system and cameras if possible. Preferably a security camera system that you can view live from your phone and be alerted to movement.
  • Keep the outside of your house well lit.
  • Trim bushes, trees, and other shrubbery to eliminate blind spots. 
  • Replace wooden doors with steel or metal doors.
  • Install a motion-sensitive lighting system.
  • Report all incidents to the police
  • Report all breaches of restraining order conditions
  • Inform your friends, neighbours and employers that there is a restraining order in effect and ask them to inform you of any contact the perpetrator attempts to make with them also
  • Give copies of the restraining order to employers, neighbours, and schools, along with a picture of the offender.
  • Change your phone number and inform your service provider of your situation request your new number be unlisted. Be careful who you share the new number with, and screen unfamiliar numbers.
  • Protect your mail. Get a PO Box or check your mail every day in your home mail box, and shred mail with identifying information (bank statements, pre-approved credit cards or appointments).
  • Change your work hours (if possible) and usual route to and from work.
  • Change the route taken to transport children to and from school or other commitments.
  • Alert school authorities of the situation and give clear instructions with official documents regarding custody arrangements.
  • Consider changing your children’s schools if necessary.
  • Reschedule appointments that the offender is aware of.
  • Use different stores and frequent different social spots.
  • Change your locks, even if they have returned the key. Copies may have been made.
  • Check all window locks and ensure they are locked. (Even on the second floor of your home)
  • Install an alarm system and cameras if possible. Preferably a security camera system which you an view immediately from your phone and be alerted to movement.
  • Keep the outside of your house well lit.
  • Trim bushes, trees, and other shrubbery to eliminate blind spots. 
  • Replace wooden doors with steel or metal doors.
  • Install a motion sensitive lighting system.

Sources: BTSADV: The National Voice of Domestic Violence